This week in Rock, pt. 1: Teacher Robba, new roommate, and cuterocity

What my students will most likely be doing instead of coming to class.

Today, I finally got my teaching schedule for the upcoming Fall semester, and it's... well, exactly as I expected. Interestingly enough, all my lessons are going to be taught through movies and television series, and the speaking and listening comprehension that comes with it. I was given a couple of movies (don't worry, all bootlegged) and episodes of "Friends", which I hope to use as a springboard for teaching my students the terms "whiny asshole" and "crazed neurotic bitch."

I also got to meet two of my fellow teachers that I'll teaching alongside in the English for Graduate Non-English Majors, both of them pretty cool. One of them's a Black dude from Manhattan who used to teach in inner cities. While rifling through the movies, he said "let's see which one of these movies has brothers in it... Shawshank Redemption, yeah, that's got one brother... lesse, what else?" to which the English program coordinator Patricia understandably responded, "...what?" The other dude is quite a character, a Canadian dude from Victoria. Imagine a hippified, cynical Dennis Quaid and you've got a pretty accurate picture of him. He hates reality tv and has "Raining Blood" by Slayer for a ringtone, so I imagine I'll get along with him.

As for other news, I have a new roommate. I told those fucks down at the league office that I didn't want a roommate, and yet, here I am again finding myself having to share my room, my space, and my freedom with yet again someone who possesses the emotional maturity of a hamster. Then again, in all fairness, the new roommate is, in fact, a hamster, so I guess it's excusable.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Sawyer.


Zoe's mom hates rodents of all shapes and forms (ie. cuddly and widdle), so her pet hamster is staying with me from now on. Originally, Zoe had another female hamster by the name of Kate (named in reference to Kate and Sawyer from Lost, a series Zoe caught up with in a record time of like a week), but Kate was given away 'cuz there was too much spawning taking place. So now, I have an adorable little hamster that brightens my day by this much more. Granted, unlike my last roommate, Sawyer doesn't do my laundry and hang up my clothes without asking me, but then again, on the bright side, he doesn't do my laundry and hang up my clothes without asking me.

While on the topic of the wonderful world of pets, we went down to the Tongzhou area to meet with Zoe's friend and browse the largest dog market in all of Northern China (according to the people at the dog market who have never strayed beyond the borders of the municipality). I was this close to buying a two month-old male Welsh Pembroke Corgi pup, a beautiful and well-behaved tan-colored creature that Zoe had a lot of difficulty putting down.

The problem is, with the break coming up, I'm not going to have enough time to take care of the little critter for at least a week, and I don't want to start off as a dick owner who's never there. I ain't down with that Michael Vick shit, son. After the holiday, we're going back there to rescue hopefully the same pup from the cloud of dust and Honghe cigarettes. I just hope the dog doesn't fucking eat the hamster.

Here's a pic of Zoe after holding the dog for like twenty minutes straight. Excuse the low resolution, as I snapped this photo on my now-shitty Motorola V3:


As for potential dog names, I decided to stick with my pre-adolescent idea of naming my future dog after a Star Wars character. So far, my list of potential names is as follows:

1) Chewie
2) Wicket

Actually, that's it. Any other names I come up with would be bordering on either obscurity or Star Wars-themed for the sake of Star Wars-themed. Zoe's not particularly impressed with "Chewie", as it sounds too much like 蚯蚓, or "qiu1 yin3" (Chinese for 'earthworm'). She thinks "Wicket" sounds a little better, but then added it might be difficult for a non-English speaker to discern between the word "wicked" and the name of a feisty Ewok that bailed the Rebel Alliance out of trouble like twice.

Oh well. Usually a couple concedes to getting a dog together after a patch of disagreements on raising a child, so I'm thinking of this as a step in the right direction. Too bad kids are fucking vile creatures that aren't nearly as self-sufficient as a Welsh Pembroke Corgi.

Dammit. I should've bought that dog today. Guess you could say I really "screwed the pooch" on this one. And I'm done. Off to sleep for me.